Productive Procrastination

During my holidays, I have cooked, cleaned and done a lot of DIYs.

I made coconut dumplings in honey butter sauce, a vanilla cake with chocolate ganache, chocolate hazelnut tart, cookies, and the regular dishes. Am i turning out to be a dessert addict?? Well its good, coz my BFF and I plan to open our cafe some day, so this should come in handy ;)

I cleaned my ass off! My room, wardrobe, and pretty much my whole house, including the chicken coop. And the dust...made me sneeze too much.

I still dont feel like studying, though.
Oops!

Holidays are corrupted.

Holidays means what? you stay home, go out, enjoy, relax, etc. But nowadays, holidays mean you stay home, do your work, finish your assignments, study for the exam which is right after your holidays get over, and basically dont sleep too much.

I have my exams in a little more than two weeks for which i obviously have to study, and i also have my favourite festival (diwali) in two weeks. Now this just sucks.





diwali has fireworks and i am a sucker for glitter and lights! come on!

Festive lights! *_*

Festival means lights everywhere!! And i think I am obsessed with bright shiny objects- be it fairy lights during the festivals or jewellery like the bangles! You just cannot have enough of them! :D

LIGHTS!!!! I just love them! 

 

Bangles! Obsessed with them! #desi

Goddess Durga.

Festive in India!!

Mythologies are filled with stories of good over evil. Like the story of Ma Durga the Hindu goddess who killed the demon Mahishasur; or prince Ram, who killed Raavan. You must have heard of these stories. But how many of us realise that mythological stories were actually made for us to learn from them?

I wont beat around the bush, but jump straight to my point. The good took serious measures against the evil. And it is time that we should too. Personally, i feel that the people who do evil dont get to have rights of their own. Did they respect the other's rights? No. SO why should they have any?

The only way to do Good over Evil is by getting rid of the evil, completely. That is what we have been taught all these years...

That is the Goddess Durga and her sons and daughters. The scene depicted here is that of killing Mahishasur, the demon. 

And that is Lord Ram killing the ten headed Raavan. Dussehra is celebrated by burning huge effigies of Raavan.

And that is me, wearing the traditional ghagra-choli that is mostly worn during these nine days of celebration.

God! I love festivals! They make u feel so happy! xoxoxo

I dislike college so much!

My college is an all-girls college and man! do i hate it! Girls (me being one, am saying this) are mean, and competitive, and complicated and at time, complete bitches. I wouldnt be surprised if research showed that girls have a bigger and more vulnerable ego than guys.

Hell, people in my class steal each other's experimental data and stuff. And in two months, we have made more enemies than friends.

Its only been like, two months and i am dying to graduate asap! The seniors are nice (as long as you worship them) but my batchmates...s*$@!!

I need some testosterone around me..! Not to sounnd desperate or homophobic, for that matter, but all my life i grew up in a co-ed environment. And now its killing me.

I'll go and google 'How to be a bitch' now.
bye.

I am, Clonazepam.

All those who suffer from panic attacks at any time in their life...have a one true companion- Clonazepam. Am i not right? Because, whenever i have a feeling of that impending doom coming, this sweet little tablet is a magic potion. No, dont worry, i am not addicted to it. And i wont! 'coz i know its only for emergencies.

But when you dig a little deeper into yourselves, you realise that this tablet is only temporary. Like acid reflux...you take the medicine to make it go away but unless you find out as to what is causing this reflux, and get it treated, no way in hell will it go away. And for this reason, you need to work at it...your panic attacks, i mean. not the acid thingy..thats not what this blog is about.

Question is, How and What are you supposed to do when one says you gotta work on it (panic disorder)?
I mean, if we knew the answer to that, then there wont be those gazillion pages on the internet on this very topic.

I'll give you the answer to this some day, hopefully soon. I am still working on it myself...

Birthday survival

I woke up on my birthday with a mild but clear enough heart thudding...and my palms were sweating.
The night before, i put my phone on silent and went off to sleep much to the dismay of some of my friends who wanted to wish me at midnight, because i was so scared i will start panicking from all that attention and puke my dinner out. Especially if this guy who is a potential love interest wishes me. (I am terrified to have a boyfriend, i dont know why. It sucks!)

The rest of the day, the panic thing kept threatening me but all throughout i just kept taking deep breaths and assuring myself that i would be fine, that in no way was i going to be in deep shit, that i need to panic.

And trust me, and the end of the day, it was all good. I was anxious, I was nervous, but not once did i panic. My 18th wasnt ruined after all! Just remember: DEEP BREATHING.

Birthday and Panic Attacks

I know..its been really long since i wrote here. College is so busy. And i hate it so much! Girl's colleges suck! All it has is meanness, back bitching and cat fights. I am desperately waiting for these 3 years to get over AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!!

Moving on...

Its my Birthday in 2 days and I am going to turn 18! I should be happy, right? I mean, I deserve to be happy! I am an 18 year old who did not do drugs, isnt a boozy and all that.. I am happy and excited and looking forward to it! but remember how i had told you about my bloody panic disorder thing? Yeah, that bitch just wants to ruin my happy moments! Its my birthday in 2 days and all i can worry about is the panic attack that i will be having midnight onward when my friends start calling. God forbid, they land up at my doorstep.

My 16th and my 17th birthday began with panic attacks. I dont know how this one should be different. My therapist said i have nothing to worry about and all that but yeah, i hate the idea of the spotlight being on me, but i love the idea too! There is no "repressed" thought in my mind...i am just anxious and the anticipation is killing me!

I really really want my 18th to be special and happy and a lot of fun! I dont want to ruin it be panicking for no reason...

Its MY  Birthday, and it WILL be a HAPPY birthday. Only I can make it happy, nobody else. And i will make sure that nothing can make these 24 hours that belong to ME, non-happy.

college

Its been a week of college and its quite okay now. And because its a convent christian college, its quite clean. I like it now. Its also located in one of the most happening places of kolkata- Park Street. So lunch breaks are awesome!

And one of my professors is pregnant, which is really cute. And we end up staring at her tummy instead of studying. haha!

I LOVE pregnant women and babies! its the cutest thing ever.

First day of College- Sucked!

So, my first day in college...which was actually orientation day...was so sucky!!

Orientation was long and boring, and the teachers were nice (you know how teachers are) but i did not like the seniors at all! And then we were shown around, and my batchmates are super weird, and then we had to copy down the time table and it was so bloody hot, and for all 500 odd girls there was just one time table with tiny tiny font and there was  no light or fan nearby and i waited for an hour on my feet, trying to get the damn time table and then i started feeling sick so i just gave up and was walking towards my car and i was feeling so dizzy and faint that i was about to faint face down on the floor but some how i managed to walk till the car and then i sat and puked.

Then i came home and was flat on the bed. Later that evening i had to go to the doctor for something for my tummy.

yup, THAT is how first days in college are.
no body gives a rat's ass about you.
I miss school so bad.

:(


exactly.

Lucky restaurant!

So one day my sister and I go to this really awesome (it is really good) restaurant for a sister lunch and we order all sorts of dumplings that we want to try and even our all time favorite- Wontons!

we ordered this dumpling dish with prawns in it which really was amazing but as we cut into it, it turned out to be completely raw. So then we sent it back. and the plate also had some wontons on it so they took that too.
My appetite was so gone but then they apologized like a million times and made new prawn dumplings for us which were heavenly... and then they sent us another plate of wontons too!!

I ate, somehow, even though the sushi (raw prawns) thing totally ruined it. Then we had some amazing desserts :D

The waiters and manager was like, really sorry and  they were like please have the dumplings for our satisfaction and everything..so we were like, okay :P haha! Oh and also, the waiter looked like Rajesh from Big bang theory! haha

So then the bill came at last and turns out, they did not charge us for the prawns thing and the extra plate of wontons at all! SO for the amount of food we had, it was a cheap meal really!

while we were leaving, the manager was like, Please come again (he probably thought we are never coming back) so all i could do was laugh because I am so going back (raw fish or not).

*burp*


A few of the many things we ate (this is just a downloaded pic). its 'Yum cha" which in chinese means "small bites to be had with tea"... the green thing on the left, yeah we ate that. yummm...

College life!

So my college life begins from the 2nd of August and I am SO excited/ scared!! I am looking forward to it 'coz its like, a whole new beginning but but oh, God...its like change to the power infinity!

Can anyone tell me what to expect in college, what college life is really like and all..?

eeeep! xoxo



well... ^ that happened in high school too, so...

Good News and Bad.

So the Good News is that i finally got into my dream college, and more importantly my mom's dream college- Loreto.
Oh God, i am so relieved and so happy! Finally, i am not college less.
Although the only not-so-happy part is that the college timings is just awful (8:30 am to 4:30 pm)!!! and we cannot even go out of the campus and hang out with our friends during a free period or the lunch break or anything. Damn... :/


And now, the really Sad News is that Cory Monteith is dead! He was just 31 and probably died of drug overdose and now Glee- the TV show (where he plays Finn Hudson) will never be the same ever again.
And his girlfriend Lea Michele, who plays Rachel in the TV show glee is obviously shattered. They were going to have babies! And now he is gone...  :(

Rest In Peace Cory aka Finn Hudson.



Lea (left) and Cory in happy times.

Future published author?

I am trying to write a novel. It sounds so easy...especially if you have a ton of things you want to write about, in your novel. but who knew that's its going to be so freaking tough!

You'll keep feeling like its not good enough, that you're not good enough and you might as well scrap the whole idea. But you know what...?

DO NOT GIVE UP!



xoxo

Like, WHAAT!?

Has anyone of you ever come across a guy (nice, kind, handsome, pretty hot) with whom you suddenly clicked and very quickly became friends, good friends, and he even goes to the extent of telling you he likes you, and sends you pictures of him and his six-packs and then when you finally tell him that you like him and want to be with him, he tells you: 'You really want to be in a relationship? I'm not ready. I dont want to ruin our friendship. What you and I have is special, I dont want to lose it.'?

So then. like, what do you do?? O_O

right?

OMG so bored!

So I got into every college that I applied to. But I can't go to any of them because there is this one college that i really want to go to and their interview is after a month and till then even though the other lists will start coming, I cant RSVP because this college that i do want to go to is like 'If u have taken admission elsewhere, please dont come here.' Which is like ,wtf! So i have to wait for a month in the HOPE that i might get into my choice of college. What if i don't!? THEN WHAT???

So yeah, that's the story of my life.

On the other hand, since i am super bored, I am learning DIY Headbands and DIY Disco Balls! :D
If you are bored too, you should totally try them out! It helps kill time.

xoxo

Just died and went to heaven *_*

Some men who are just so HOT:

Oh good Lord! How amazing is Henry Cavill's smile? Do you agree??

That man's smile... *I just died and went to heaven*

And a special mention-

CHRISTOPHER REEVE!!!

No body else can wear red underpants and look as HOT as him!

And God was very partial when He created Jensen Ackles. Hottness personified:

Damn right. Some men are just blessed O:)  *sigh*